WTSF: March to the Sea – Part the Third

Have you ever seen a book cover and thought “what in the hell could that possibly be about?” Well, we’re actually digging in to one of those weird novelties (two actually) to figure out what the hell is going on. And, because this is too much work for one solitary book detective, I’m bringing in a partner. So me and my pal Kyla MacDonald will be alternating weeks, each with our own weird book, breaking them down and digging in deep, trying to once and for all figure out… WTSF?

This week, we cover two chapters because I guess that’s a thing we can do.

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So we got two kinda nothing chapters to power through, which seems like the perfect way to ease back into things after my two week vacation in Europe.

It was fun. I got to be in England on the last day before it set itself on fire. Plus, Paris was neat. Food was pretty good.

Anyhoozles, Roger alias Captain Sergei has entered a village called Ran Tai looking for mercenary positions. Or in rhyming terminology, merc work. Apparently, Ran Tai is incredibly dry, which is unpleasant for the native Mardukans, who are, we learn covered in a thick, viscous mucous.

Dinosaur Aucasaurus
Here’s the first Google Image search result for “screaming dinosaur” because if you thought i was gonna google image “thick viscous mucous” you’re fucking high.

So while Roger and company look for merc work, the rest of the marines mostly just screw around and scavenge drink coolers out of pieces of armor from their dead squamates.

Yeah, that’s a thing.

The writing is Weber’s usual charming clunkiness that I honestly am growing to love. My favorite bit is the following line:

“The Marines also followed the local custom of the afternoon siesta.”

Hee hee.

siesta

            Here is the first google image search result for “siesta” which feels, um, SU-per racist.

We get a lot of scenes of marines splish-splashing around in a lake awkwardly flirting with each other like middle schoolers at summer camp. Like, these are pretty much two chapters of trained military personnel getting drunk and screwing around.

Happy Fourth of July everybody.

The marines are also described as “frolicking”

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While this wasn’t the FIRST google image result for “frolicking” I think you’ll all agree it was the one you needed to see.

Roger finally meets up with the contractor, where he learns that the Mardukans are going to be competing with him for merc work.

Enjoy that, because it’s THE ONLY PLOT DEVELOPMENT IN THESE CHAPTERS.

But don’t worry, we get this sentence about one of the marines:

“Mack took a chew of his own jerky.”

Ew.

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